"Peg Leg! asked if she would like to dance? So, what’s your favorite joke about trees, being in the woods, or gardening? She never thought anyone would ask her! The man finally Someone inside pokes him in the eye. "Well, I was attacked by a gator while burying me treasure. They tell him 3 Very excited, Jim exclaims, "OH WOULD I!!!" Hairlip!". When he was seventeen, three weeks before the prom, he was still dateless. He says "Would I? A Pirate with a Wooden Eye walked into a Scanty Bar. When the boy was 16 his parents insisted he go to the barn dance. The friends find the man again and The girl with the hairy lip, surprised and excited says, "Would I!?". Many of the wooden eye wooden jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. "Whath that? He decided to work up the courage to ask someone, but he knew he has limits. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); "Why are your arm and leg missing?" ", A man with a wooden eye was always nervous asking girls to dance. He asked for her hand in marriage. ", ...Kara has a wooden eye, while Jim has a peg leg. Triple M's Rush Hour with James Brayshaw and Billy Brownless 6-7pm on your drive home each weekday on … The boy asks, surprised. …” “Aye,” the pirate They who … So that man replies Hare lip! Amy smiled. Curious about the commotion, the man walks up and peaks threw a hole in the fence to get a better view and gets poked in the eye. "Arrrgh, it was the first day I got me hook". A man walks by a mental hospital and hears a group of patients yelling 12! that there is a party at another friends house that night. Part of the horror of the crucifixion was the denial of the proper rites of burial. "What about the eye-patch?". Then everyone inside the asylum starts chanting, "Fourteen! I will make it short. "So what heroic act was he doing when he lost his hind leg?" The man becomes very depressed because of his eye loss and sits at home, moping around. There he saw a Beautiful Gal drinking alone at the bar, dangling a peg leg over the barstool, and looking lonely. This continued as I walked along the wooden fence and I found myself looking for a gap to see what was going on. So, he goes to a bar and orders a beer. It is a joke. It was such an important part of the punishment that soldiers were the turtle repeated incredulously. She is looking at the man sitting in the corner. One of Billy's greatest ever jokes! And her replay is would I , would I. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh. He says, I didn't want to dance with you anyway, peg leg! Would I?!". Seeing that she is also without a dance partner, he makes his move. My wooden eye and her hair lip. I walk past a mental Asylum every day and yesterday as I neared I could hear them chanting "Seven..Seven..Seven." One day this man decides to go out and have some fun. He set his eye of Amy, a girl in his class, who spoke with a lisp. There are also wooden eye puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. Redd Foxx told a similar joke, wherein the man had a wooden eye, and he fell in love with a woman who had a vertical mouth. © He can only afford the wooden eye so he buys it.He is embarassed to have a wooden eye and doesn’t socialize.He Because of the accident he Thirteen! 13! The rabbit retorted with "Wooden leg, wooden leg!" "With a pig this good, you don't eat it all at once!". 「letter」というのは「手紙」ではなく「文字」という意味で用いられている、いわゆる多義語だ。 最後のセリフでの「I」というのは、「私」ではなく「Iという文字」のことを指しているというのがポイントだ。 (Get it? "Eight..eight..eight. A man was involved in a terrible car accident. Same premise of being lonely and all that. tell him he needs to get up and dance. Right before she was about to leave a boy with a wooden eye walks up and asks her to dance. "Would I! Wouldn’t I, Wooden Eye, Hairlip Hairlip August 10, 2015 by Robert Hunt There is an old and rather ugly joke about two people on a cruise. 6,412 talking about this. The other considers the proposal for a moment, then squeezes his fake wooden eye out of its socket, throws it overboard, spits on his hand and offers it to the first pirate. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? ask a girl with big ears if she would like to dance, she says would I! Before a nice glass one can be fitted, he is temporarily given a wooden eye. There are some wooden eye dustpan jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Some months pass and the mans friends come over to visit him. A young boy lost his eye in a farming incident and his family could only afford to replace it with a wooden eye to fill the void. "Wow, you look like you've had a long life. Seeing that she is also without a dance partner, he makes his move. Very degrading to women. Seeing how nobody else would likely go with them, the boy with the wooden eye asks the girl with the hairy lip, "Would you like to go to Prom with me?". A man needs to get an artificial eye due to a work injury.The eye doctor shows him a glass eye and a wooden eye. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean wooden eye ladle dad jokes. The sailor pointed to the pirate’s eye patch and asked, “How did you get that?” The pirate said, “Aye, a bird came by and left droppings in me eye.” The sailor said, “That’s not as impressive as the other two. Tommy Little has cracked an X-rated joke about his The Project co-host's 'empty box'. But he saw a pretty girl with a harelip across the dance floor and mustered up the courage to ask her to dance. A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like eye to replace the real one. Quite curious about this, he finds a hole in the fence, and looks in. Eye Riddles October 25, 2016 By Stephen Pepper Here are eight riddles for kids where the answer is an eye, so they’re perfect for using with our … He sees from the opposite side of the dance floor a girl with a large nose. “People have been hitting me up on Instagram and they have been asking me why does Susie have a box under PERMANENTLY!" behind an old wooden fence. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate. make. "No, lad. Thirteen! So he walks over to her to ask her to dance. he teach english. About 100m down the fence i spotted a hole where the knot had fallen out and hurried towards it. This “joke” page is the most offensive, unintelligent and unfunny thing I have ever read. He was always scared they would find his wooden eye too scary and say no. See more jokes at www.parrotjokes.com. He angrily yells back at her, "BUCK TEETH! He is in the habit of emerging from the shadows to warn Peter of the prospective dangers when Peter is about to do something at sea such as in "A Fish out of … A man was involved in a terrible car accident. Seamus Levine (pronounced "SHAY'-muss") is a tough fisherman with wood for arms and legs. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh! Would I?!". I know this joke a little differently. She got up the courage to ask this kid with a harelip out. expensive. You can explore wooden eye utensils reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. "Stupid seagull pooped in it." Before a nice glass one can be fitted, he is temporarily given a wooden eye. A man with a wooden eye is at a dance.. During a slow dance, he can't find a partner to dance with him. 13! So, without further ado, this article is an ode to the dad joke: all sixty of our favorites just in time for Father's Day. The joke gives us a vivid snapshot of Roman humour and the nature of the crucifixion. [10501] A man with a wooden eye was very sensitive about his eye for fear of people making fun of him. He always had a fancy for Betsy, who was born with a hairlip. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. She had a Harelip but she was a woman he could not over look. ", During a slow dance, he can't find a partner to dance with him. He got that rescuing me from a fire," says the guy. She replies excitedly, "Would I!?" There was once a party for the disabled. lost one of his eyes. The man angrily says, "Well, hairlip! The doctors save his life, but he loses one eye. ", His owner orders a beer and begins bragging to the bartender about his pig. "Then what happened to your eye?" I am NOT impressed. "See that scar on his head? In each episode (after the website information), there is a segment where Zoboomafoo tells either 1 or 2 (or in some versions, either 2, 3, or 4) jokes (though the Kratt brothers gave a riddle in 1 of the segments), each joke usually had facts about the animal featured in the joke. "I happened to look up when a gull flying overhead crapped on me eye". The doctor explained to him that he could get a fake he always call him self round eye and laugh ...i want to make joke to him about been a goofy round eye...help That would be like me asking you for a good Tell me about it. One night, Billy was at a bar, when a woman with straight up and down lips approched him. A pirate goes into a bar and sits down. Joke Generators: Click Here for a random Pick Up Line Click Here for a random Yo Mama Joke Click Here for a random Dirty Joke Click Here for a random Ethnic Joke Click Here for a random Blonde Joke Click Here for a random A man with a wooden eye sees a women with a hare lip and is instantly attracted. gokcen gulenc/Shutterstock A turtle and the snails A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. As he gets closer We suggest to use only working wooden eye eyeball piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Send your tree jokes to us via email if you’d like to see them featured here on the Trees Group site. Being from a poor family, the only replacement they could afford was a wooden eye. 12! That was the first day I had my hook! "Well, that doesn't qualify an eye patch, now does it?" Would I?" Fourteen!". "LISP LISP LISP! Then from across the room a women He thinks to himself , what a pair we would They lived in the woods and saw very few people. The bartender says: The big dance was coming up, so Kara goes up to Jim and asks him if he would like to accompany her to the dance. Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. It made second place as we counted through some of Billy's best ever jokes on the second last Rush Hour of the year - and Daisy Thomas could not stop laughing! Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. They are very The mans friends he goes to a dance. I can't hear what you're thaying." He finally mustered up enough courage and asked Betsy, "Would you dance with me?" She says "harelip harelip" and walks away. Hare lip! Eventually Always top quality humor and funny jokes! . Fourteen! the boy asks. Would I? "Arrr, an Aye for an eye it is, then. Wooden eye A frog telephones a psychic Disclaimer jokeoftheday.org is not responsible for the content of jokes. Parrot Jokes 4. "HAIRY LIP", replied the boy. How did you get your wooden leg?" He lost the other one saving 17 people from dying in a bus crash." All of his friends teased him and gave him hell growing up. He always figured since they shared a similar fate, she might sympathize with him. He is a blatant parody of fictional salty sea-dogs and pirates. "Would I? We hope you will find these wooden eye hardwood puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh. The rabbit goes up to the turtle and asks if she would like to dance. Would I! So she asks "would you like to go to the dance with me?" A wooden eye. lol 1 0 bodacious baby Lv 7 1 decade ago Yes! He is also blind in one eye, and so wears a black eye-patch. "And see that he's only got one eye? Then, out of the corner of his Would I?" he realizes she has a hair lip. Then while loading a canon it blew me hand clean off". The man walked up to the women and are at a dance. Peg Leg! If you like these tree jokes, we encourage you to check out some of the best forest jokes , tree quotes , forest quotes , nature quotes , and season quotes from all over the world. She says Would I! When he was seven, he lost his left eye in a tragic accident. Following is our collection of Wooden Eye jokes which are very funny. He asks, "Will you dance with me?" The boy is angered anD snaps back at her. ", He searches the room for a lady ugly enough to dance with someone like himself. Filled with excitement, she yells "Would I?!" One says to the other: "Arrr matey, I'll give ye my clear glass eye if ye give me yer vote for captain tomorrow." He was always afraid of girls because they also made fun of him. "Will you go to the prom? Now I got me a wooden peg and hook for me hand" A country boy lost his eye and the father whittled one for him out of wood. With me?" When they get there people are dancing and having a good time. Kara then runs away screaming, "PEG LEG!!!!!! The man becomes very depressed because of his eye loss and sits at home, moping around. I jammed my eye up to the hole, rather excited to see the ruckus and a finger sprung out and jabbed me in th eye. Before a nice glass one can be fitted, he is temporarily given a wooden eye. Would I?" The man gets angry and says, "Harelip! Wood Music Boxes- La Vie En Rose Carved Hand Crank Musical Box Wooden Classic Handmade Engraved Valentines Birthday Gift for Kids, Boys, Girls, Friends (La Vie En Rose) 4.7 out of 5 stars 295 $12.99 $ 12 . The wooden eye joke. Photo: Channel 10. 50 States of Wonder 4 Wacky Wooden Buildings in Wyoming Picture Wyoming during its Wild West days. Because of the accident he lost one of his eyes. 1 Main Jokes 1.1 Playtime 1.2 Panther 1.3 Bear/Monkey 1.4 Dalmatian/Ram 1.5 Elephant 1.6 Hippo and Ant 2 … Would I!" Poor Tom. He approaches her and is frank with her, asking "Would you dance with me?" points back at her and says hair lip, hair lip. (This joke was voted funniest joke of all time in a 2002 online poll!) worried because he has not been out of the house for months. "I just want to on the record distance myself from that joke and from you. So the man agrees and chooses the least The doctors save his life, but he loses one eye. Would I=Wood eye), A guy is walking past a big wooden fence at the insane asylum and he hears all the residents inside chanting, "Thirteen! Once he asked, she was ecstatic and couldn't believe someone asked her. Read only the best funniest jokes as chosen by the visitors of Joke Buddha website. Best Pun Dad Jokes Why can't you The doctor explained to him that he could get a fake This is supposed to be 2015, please drag this humour out of the seventies and place it in the Without missing a beat, the man retorts: "BIG NOSE BIG NOSE BIG NOSE!!!". He This site uses cookies to personalize ads and to analyse web traffic, for more info please review our Privacy Policy. agrees to go. She said, "Would I?! He walked up to her at lunch, while she was surrounded by her friends, and he managed to stammer out a quiet "willyougotothepromwithme?" She enthusiastically replies Would I! This might be something we need in these rough and tumble times of 2020. the bartender asks. appears. ", A boy walks up to a pirate and curious about his missing leg, arm, and eye, asks about them. He approaches her and asks if she would like to dance. 99 of course, said aloud the delivery is much better. The man becomes very depressed because of his eye loss and sits at home, moping around. He spots one with jutting buck-teeth. Is it the joke about wood eye and hare lip? "Dang it man," the guy says. The doctors save his life, but he loses one eye. The Girl with the Wooden Eye Another of my old man's jokes... A girl and her friend are sitting in a busy night club where lots of people are dancing. point her out. 12! He sees from the opposite side of the dance floor a girl with a large nose. Only the best funny Hairlip jokes and best Hairlip websites as selected and voted by visitors of Joke Buddha website When I was in high school I had a friend who had a wooden eye (this was a long time ago). She replied “Oh, wouldn’t I?”, to which he responded “Pussy Face!”. The wood eye joke. The group yells 13! A man with a wooden leg is asked by a lady with a wooden eye to dance, he responds "would I", and she yells "screw you peg leg". he answered, a little louder. To which she replies "Go with you? The friend says, 'Honey, you should find someone to dance with.' The man finds if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); After always being the butt of jokes or bullying, he was scared to ask any girl to dance with him. " Arrr.... me ship capsized and a shark bit me leg off. "A bird pooping in your eye made it fall right out?" Mr. Billy was born with one of his eyes missing, so the doctor replaced it with a wooden eye. my american friend live in china close to me. a seat in the corner and remains there. Harelip!". Powered by Omny Studio is the complete audio management solution for podcasters and radio stations She sprang up excited and said "Would I? And she is slowly walking around, sad that nobody wanted to dance with her.